“Go West, young man.”

26 02 2010

One of the most historic quotes in American history, coined by none other than Fergie, I assume. [Ed. note: Horace Greeley made it popular, but who cares] Rhyme&Reason has been unusually quiet of late, but it has been with good reason. The CEO, COO, CFO, President of sales and marketing, editor, art director, writer and intern are all moving to California.

Yes, all of those people are in fact the same person. I like titles, ok? They’re good for self-esteem, I saw it on Oprah.

Rhyme&Reason has only been in existence for a short while, so while I don’t really know what this Web site is yet, I know what it’s not. And in this place, which is apparently some sort of series of tubes (thanks, Al), sometimes that’s more important anyway.Before I get into what R&R isn’t, we need a foundation of information to build upon. Life isn’t a game of Jenga, you play from the ground up on this little blue marble. I am moving to North Hollywood, CA, in search of answers to questions that have evaded me for me entire life.

Who would ever give George Lopez his own show?

When using the bathroom, how come we wash our hands after we touch our penises, not before? I’d rather give some stranger a horrible illness than my precious little guy.

Who drinks Rock Star energy drink?

Why are the street signs in LA blue? (Seriously, I am going to write my alderman and ask him this question)

I’ve lived in/near Chicago pretty much my entire adult existence, so this move is fairly significant on the list of major life events. I’d put if somewhere above the Bears losing the Super Bowl, and below my first trip to 2nd base (I’ll never forget you, whoever you are)

But if Rhyme&Reason has anything, it is a semblance of journalism integrity. I will want to share my experiences with all of you, but this is not a diary or a dream journal. You are not my TalkGirl, and I will not share my hopes and dreams and loves and losses with a bunch of weirdos on the internet who have nothing better to do but browse this sorry excuse for a Web site. That is not Rhyme&Reason is for. That’s what your blog is for.

But that doesn’t mean some of the things I do aren’t newsworthy, informative, helpful, etc., and when that happens I’m going to try and inform the masses as I always do. So bear with me through these lean times and you might learn a thing or two along the way. No promises though, you seem pretty slow to begin with.

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